Open Winter Post 2016

[punintentions]

This post is intended partly to act as an overflow for threads from Baker Street's overflowed thirst mistletoe meme. But I will gladly take any new threads as well, either for mistletoe or general winter shenanigans!

For some winter prompts, this meme has some! And with the mistletoe, it can either be ordinary or magical, and have whatever sorts of requirements would make the thread the most fun! My only real preference is that I won't write out any sex. Beyond that, go wild and be merry, everyone!

Comments

and yet here you are

[hamnation]

[#STOP]

It means nothing of that sort! It is unholy in the cursed manner. Unlike you, I do know how to bathe myself!

you're here too?!?!?!

[buyo]

[ oh my god YOU DID NOT JUST-- she gasps, totally offended by that! ]

I know how to bathe myself, dumbass! And I don't do it with gross animals like you!

[ she crosses her arms and looks away. ]

I don't even want to think about the things you do to your rats while in the shower! Ugh, gross!

I'm a victim in this scenario!

[hamnation]

Hmph...! Your occasional odors tell a very different story...

[He can cross his arms and look away too!]

I do nothing inappropriate with the beasts who walk among me! All that I do is wash their sin away!

YOU WANTED THIS

[buyo]

[ oh my god i hope you enjoy this, gundam, because she's just going to cry REALLY, REALLY LOUDLY NOW just to annoy the shit out of him for insulting her about how she smells!

mahiru showers with her ok :'( she smells kind of good now.......... ]

NO YOU

[hamnation]

[Still, she's been smelly in the past!!

Gundam growls and tries to cover his ears in response to her shrieking.]

Hrk... It's the call of a puny banshee! Silence at once, you vulgar fiend!

sILENCE

[buyo]

[ like that'll make her shut up!! she even throws a tantrum now and steps on his foot again. ]

How can you be so mean?!

[hamnation]

Grgh! [This time as his foot is stepped on, he tries to raise his own foot quickly in an attempt to at least upset her balance.]

Do you know who I am? Have you not heard the tales? I am the warlock, the shadow of your very nightmares! Tell me, did you ever expect to exchange pleasantries with a Supreme Overlord of Ice?!

[buyo]

[ EVEN RUDER?????? thankfully, she's graceful when she almost falls. she manages to catch herself, hopping on one sandal before placing her other foot down. then she yells at him, showing the same amount of conviction gundam is showing. ]

You're just some freaky roleplayer, that's what you are! You're just a dumb breeder pretending to be somebody else! Do you know what happens to people like you? They stay in their mom's basements because they have no place else to go!

[hamnation]

[It's what she deserves.

He steams with anger and holds up his hand dramatically as he argues back at her.]

First of all, one chooses a subterranean lair only because it is an ideal location for plotting evil, and also because it comes with a high chance of being adjacent to an underground hellmouth!

Second of all... Your words, much like you yourself, are nothing but pure trash! You know nothing of what you speak!

[buyo]

More like you have no other choice but to live in the basement. I know what I'm talking about.

[ she laughs at her own joke, but truth be told, all this yelling has made her tired. what to do, what to do... ]

But you know what? I don't even want to talk to you anymore. It's a waste of my time, and a waste of your horrible breath.

[ from here on in, she'll proceed to ignore the hell out of him! how long will it last, dun dun dun... ]

[hamnation]

I can thrive in any environment, much like the beasts I choose to walk with. [He groans and then he glares at her.]

Hmph... Do you truly intend to remain silent?

[buyo]

[ she glares right back, not at all speaking. yeah!! suck it, gundam!!!! ]

[hamnation]

...It seems that you've chosen your fate. To remain trapped in place forever, as if petrified by the gorgon herself. Kehehe... I am sure that many birds will find you to be a suitable home.

[buyo]

Ummmm, [ oh god she's talking again. beware! ] hello? You're stuck here too, remember?

[hamnation]

[oh god her mouth still works

But he raises a hand and is quick to clarify.]

Only my mortal shell is! Yet my inner self will be able to escape this trap through astral projection...

[buyo]

Oh my goooooodddd...

[ she folds her arms and rolls her eyes. gundam, what the fuck is wrong with you. ]

You need to stop talking crap before I bop you on the head!

[ she will have to tiptoe but SHE WILL DO IT, DAMN IT. ]

[hamnation]

[Would tiptoing even cut it.]

Hmph! You would dare to bop this warlock's crown as you would a mole of the earth? How laughable! It is not my fault that my ways are beyond your comprehension! In every conceivable way, I am beyond your pitiful reach!

i'm so sorry..........

[buyo]

[ unlikely...

she grits her teeth, though, and tears are welling up in her eyes, too. god!! this is so annoying. ]

You... You big jerk!

[ she jumps now and latches onto him like a koala, but she moves rather quickly, fully intending on climbing him so he can bop him HARD on the head. ]

Why you always lying

[hamnation]

[Gundam bristles and growls as the koala child scales him.]

Grrrr... Unhand me, you unruly child! Y-your existence is not worthy of touching mine-!

[He'll grunt as he's bopped on the head, but then he'll try to push her off at the same time.]

ah... you caught me redhanded

[buyo]

[ she's sticking to him like glue, or well... she literally is latching onto him, one arm around his neck, nails digging deep into his skin so he can hold onto him safely and she won't fall as he tries to push her off. her other hand keeps bopping him. THIS IS WAR!!!! ]

Too bad! Take this! And this! And this! Jerk!

It was easy

[hamnation]

Hrngh-! [He groans as his head is bopped, and the nails dig into his skin.]

How dare you! Prepare to face... divine retribution! [As he says that, he reaches for her hair and starts yanking on it.]

i guess... you'll just have to put handcuffs on me

[buyo]

Ow, ow, owwie!!

[ if that's the case, her legs wrap around him tighter like a snake and she digs her nails deep on the shaved part of his head. ]

I'm going to tell Mahiru about this, I swear it!

wow you just keep on rolling out the kinks

[hamnation]

[Wow, what an abominable creature. Gundam winces at her relentless assault.]

Hmph... Tell the whole world for all I care! There is none here whose power level compares to mine.

N-now, unhand me! Or... or I will bring this farce to an end! Do you really wish to face the Kiss of Death?!

wachu gon do about it

[buyo]

If it means getting away from you, then fine!

[ she pulls at his hair this time!! SO DONE WITH THIS ]

shame you most likely

[hamnation]

Hrngh... So be it! You will get away from not only me, but the world of the living! That shall be your fate!

[He tugs at her hair some more and turns red as he kisses her dumb face!]